[Vol. 29] Giving Satan a Lap Dance
And not caring if it lands us a spot in hell.
Welcome back to That’s Gay, a candidly queer newsletter for a candidly queer world (cheers to that 😉 🥂), written by me, Till Kaeslin.
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So the title and photo of this newsletter may be confusing to you. Or they may make perfect sense. That all depends on whether you’ve seen Lil Nas X’s newest music video for his latest release, Montero.
Remember Old Town Road? The song that shot up the Billboard Hot 100 and played in every damn car on every damn summer drive in 2019? Here’s the music video to jog your memory.
That was Lil Nas X, then up-and-coming (and still closeted) rapper. He came out publicly over Twitter just a few months later, in June of 2019, in honor of Pride month.
From ridin’ horses to ridin’ satan.
In the music video for Montero (which you should definitely check out here) Lil Nas X passes up the horses saddle for Satan’s lap.*
*Do you capitalize Satan? I’m not sure, I've never written about the devil before.
I’m not being metaphorical here either. In the music video, Lil Nas X literally grinds on Satan’s lap – and that after he ditches his ‘in’ into heaven by sliding down a stripper pole all the way from the pearly gates to the firey pits of hell.
Seriously, if you haven’t seen it, you should watch it here before reading on. Some things just need to be seen.
As you can imagine, reviews are mixed.
Some love it, some argue this is the last straw in the gay agenda to bring on the downfall of their good Christian society.
As for me? I fucking love it. Lil Nas X changed the game with this one.
Here’s why I think so:
Do I love the song? I’m starting to, but not at first. It’s one of those songs that I’ve come to love because of the context around it.
But, truth be told, without the video or the context of the song, I probably wouldn’t listen to it all that much. So what I’m about to say is less of a review of the song itself and more a reflection on the conversation it’s started.
Montero is exactly what the world needed right now.
The number one hate comment I suspect most queer creatives get when they post their work online is about them going to hell, or needing “saving”, or being somehow “wrong” or “unnatural”. I know – I follow enough queer creatives to know.
Montero gave that sentiment the middle finger.
The video seems to say, “fuck where you think I’m headed”. It says, “I don’t believe you”.
I’m not religious, and I don’t come from a religious family. I also don’t hate religion or religious people – in fact, I’ve always admired my religious friends for their belief.
What I don’t particularly love, however, is being told that I’m going to be punished by a God I don’t believe in, that I’ll be sent to a place I don’t believe exists, all just for being the person I am. It’s patronizing, it’s tiring, and it needs to be challenged.
So, to all the religious people that may be reading this: I don’t care about your hell.
I don’t. I respect that you believe in it, but I don’t care that you think I’m going there for being queer. Why? Because I don’t believe it exists.
Lil Nas X doesn’t care about your hell either.
That’s why he can be so nonchalant about giving the literal devil a lap dance. He’s taking everything that’s been said to him growing up – the fear of going to hell that kept him in the closet throughout his teenage years – and throwing it back in society’s face.
For him, grinding on the devil isn’t blasphemous, it’s a big fuck you to all the people that thought he was going to hell long before he ever released this video; the very same people that thought he was doomed the moment he tweeted his coming out.
If you think grinding on the devil in a music video is too much, I’d like to remind you that there are queer kids out there that are told they will burn in hell for eternity should they choose to come out and live openly.
Doesn’t that sound like just a bit too much to you?
Shortly after the song’s release, Lil Nas X posted this on Instagram:
It’s his unapologetic statement that yes, this video is meant to push an agenda.
It’s the agenda to leave LGBTQ+ kids alone.
For so long, gay artists and creatives have had to tip toe around the “sensitivity” of the queer metaphors and messages in their work because they didn’t want to set off the inevitable knee-jerk reaction that would leave them shunned.
The go-to was always to assure the public that you didn’t have an agenda; that you were just an artist that happened to be gay.
The truth is, though, that no matter how hard you want to separate yourself and your work from your queerness at times, you can’t.
I should know, I’ve tried.
Who you are, who you love, and, frankly, how you were treated growing up are all highly flammable fodder for the creative fire. These things are emotional, they inspire, and, above all else, they’re real.
Real resonates. Being real in this world is also, unfortunately, having “an agenda”.
With this music video, Lil Nas X made it cool to create with a gay agenda.
It no longer has to be coded into a hidden metaphor or sandwiched between apologies, it can be as on the nose as sliding down a cosmic stripper pole to grind on the devil.
The gay agenda can be as “too much” as it is to tell kids (children!) that they will burn in hell. And I can’t wait for every queer kid out there to believe in that.
Today’s discussion Q:
What are your thoughts on the video? On the song? I’m curious.
I’ve already answered. Let me know what you think! As always, I’ll be reading/responding to all.
And that was That’s Gay, Volume 29. See you in Volume 30, folks! Omg, 30 volumes!!
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